A whole lot to talk about…

Well, I am just 2 weeks from being 21. I thought I would be more excited than I am… I am I guess, I can now go to more concerts, and get into bars… Haha…

I ran Mordis today at Checotah. And I told my self after the run at Graysons Rodeo. I was going to just school him in the ally, and really let him relax and take it easy. He never got bad or anything, he was really on the bit during my run and I had no control. I got on Mordis around #35 today… I was 141. I poured down rain on us and I saddled him in the trailer (I have photos on My Space of us soaked). Anyway, I schooled him in the ally and really got him to relax. During the BIG drags I took him into the arena and made him STOP, back up, and roll back. Over and Over… Until he relaxed and got off the bit, then I patted him on the neck and walked him out. We made a GREAT RUN today! Mordis worked better than he has in a really long time. I had 5 or 6 people tell me he did great. I was excited Diane Guinn even told me he looked really smooth… That meant a lot to me. But, I felt like Mordis did exceptional, most horses got past their 1st barrel at least 1 full stride, but Mordis nailed it. I was very proud, I did not push him to the first, and I was glad I didn’t. When I got there I could tell he was like, woah this ground is shifty… But, he just came right back around and had a great 2nd and 3rd also. I didn’t push him very hard out. I was a 16.0 =) He was a little sore tonight when I got him home, it’s in his right front foot. (He had lost that shoe a week ago, and maybe that is what did it. I packed his front feet and put the magnetic bell boots on him… So, we’ll see how he is tomorrow… )

Okay, so now time to rant rave and vet… HAHAHAHA ~ Okay Well, I cleaned house. Ha… I woke up about 3 months ago and realized I had surrounded my self with people who weren’t really my friends. I am pretty hard on my self, I’ve always tried to be a people pleaser. So, in some way I guess I attrack negative people, because the more you put me down, the more I try to make you like me. And I finally realized HEY – I can’t allow someone to define who I am… I mean no matter what you do in life SOMEONE isn’t going to like it. From the way I talk to the way I train… Someone thinks I should do it different. And finally I just had enough. I had spent so much time trying to please people who didn’t matter I had forgot about the people who truly matter. I did some culling, and just now can I breath again. I realized that all this time, I had friends and family who love me and have always supported me… And those are the only people I need to worry about… What is most important to me is the way someone makes you feel when you are around them… And I say I am sooo postive, well I had friends in my life who weren’tpositive people, and when I was around them I wasn’t positive. Then I would walk away feeling bad I said things I had said… I DONT NEED THAT, and I shouldn’t be around people who are like that. And now I just have NO room in my life for someone who makes me feel like I am not good enough, like I have something to prove, or people who want to judge me or other people in general. I am human, and I make mistakes. So do all people. I am not in there situation, and it is not for me to judge. And I think the best way is to live and let live… So now the people in my life are the ones who will help me up, dust me off, and laugh with me when I hit rock bottom… Then sit on the porch and help me make a game plan to get back to the TOP and push me the WHOLE WAY!!!! Those are the people I have in my life. Those people make me a better person, and I love them for that… And from this point on, I am not going out of my way to please people… Take me for who I am… Because I won’t change. =)

Also, there is a new beau in my life… I am still a bit jaded from the last relationship… But, I am getting better. And the new beau is someone who stand beside me no matter what, he believes in me, and he stands up for me. I found this quote and he it really reminds me of him – The only guy you need in your life is the one who proves to you he needs you in his. I love that quote, and it’s very true.

Tara

Somewhere behind the barrel racer you’ve become, the hours of riding, the horses [[you]] pushed, the horses that pushed you,and your parents and fans who cheer for you, it’s the little girl who fell in love with the sport, and never looked back… ride for [[her]]